Hey everyone! Hope you're all doing alright! Getting ready for the holidays I'd imagine~
Well it's been a good run. Two years now. Over 1,000 watchers! Damn! I'd have never imagine I would make it this far! All thanks to you guys! <3 These past two years have been great, but a lot has happened. I've made a lot of friends and lost some. Did plenty of stupid things, said a lot of hurtful things. Promised to much, did too little. Committed all 7 sins and then some. Though I had a lot of fun, all great things have to end one way or another.
As great an artist some of you proclaim me to be, I am still just human. I am no better than any of you. I'm but a humble artist. As many of you know, life likes to beat us up, and it's important to keep our heads held high... but sometimes we gotta back off, for we can only take so much... You probably know where this is going.
I'm tired guys. I hurt. I can't do this forever no matter how much I wish I could. Sometimes we need a break. My time here on DA was eventful. Though I met some fucking amazing people here, I have hurt quite a few. I let my pride, my envy, and my greed get the best of me, and in turn, I have hurt some people. Under a lot of stress, regret, depression, anger.... sometimes I just turn into some fire spitting demon who cares only for himself, not thinking twice as to how his actions would effect others. This is a problem of mine. A flaw I can't seem to get rid of. I don't want to hurt people. Why should I be around if all I do is hurt those I care about?
Yes of course, this is kind of a “good-bye” journal. I'm just done feeling this way. My last source of internet, my phone, is going to be turned off later today until I am able to pay. I don't know when I'll get it back. I guess this is the best of times as ever. I will be gone until I feel better... If I don't feel better, I may deactivate my page. I will give points back to those I still owe, and scatter my points among a select few. If I do get better, I guess I'll be back to drawing in no time... I just need this break from everything... depending how I feel after this Hiatus will determine if I'm saying goodbye forever or not.
But before I go, there are those I wish to apologize to...
First, there's =Nere-Neri. I' so god damn sorry for being such a thoughtless douche bag. I'm sorry I said those things to you and thought that way. I was wrong. You did not deserve any of that shit from anyone, especially me. I was hoping one day, I would be able to really express how sorry I am, but this is all you get for now... if you even care at all anymore. I know you hold grudges. I've just been afraid to talk to you again. I wish you all the happiness in the world. And just know I was honored to be your senpai.
~Tabersnack I'm sorry I hurt your feelings... I'm sorry I was never really there to just listen to you. Instead I yelled at you when there was an issue instead of taking your side and helping you. Sorry I am still a douche bag. I seem to never really learn my own lesson. I always said we have to better ourselves before we better our lives. I never really listened to my own advise... makes me the hypocrite, huh?
=Electard Meggy. I'm sorry I can't be there to help you for awhile. Sorry I'm leaving without a proper goodbye and I hope you can forgive me... I know you're dealing with so much, more than a girl should, but you gotta keep smiling for me, okay? Promise me you keep you're head high. Stay strong. Remember, if you don't believe in yourself, believe in the me that believes in you! You can accomplish anything, girl. I believe in you. Hang on tight until I get back <3333
*Artistic-TwistI'm sorry bu. Sunshine ain't shining for awhile. I know the sky's going to be gray for awhile with me gone. I'm just taking a break, to give me enough time to think... to calm down and feel better about myself. Maybe when I get back, I can crack a real smile again. I know how much you love when I smile. When I get back you'll be the first to know. I love you babu <333
I'm sorry to the Titty Team (you know who you are). I left without taking time to talk to you. I guess I was too emotional to give a shit at the time. I'm sorry I'm a stubborn dick who likes to play America. I just wanted to make sure everything was peaceful like it was before. I know you guys will be fine without the Peacekeeper Senpai Danny. You're in good hands <3
=FlyingFreeFantasy Sorry Roxxi. I'm sorry we wont be able to finish our RP. I know how much you loved to RP, but I always said later. Now you're just as busy, if not more, than me so we rarely ever talk anymore as much as I miss talking to you. You have my number though! Don't be a stranger, mkay!
And sorry to everyone else... I don't want to leave, but something tells me I have to. Somehow I know I'll come back happier. I just don't know when that will be. Hell, I might well be your Christmas present this year! No promises though. Remember, I love all of you little shits. Even if you didn't take your time to read this or even given a shit, I still love you. I hope you all have a Merry Christmas, and a happy holiday!
This is LancerWolf 13, signing off...